How to Not Self Sabotage your New Year’s Resolutions

by Amanda Abella  - January 7, 2020

Ring in the New Year

Welcome to 2020, a new decade. We decided to bring in 2020 with some fun and also a “Thank You!” to many of our podcast listeners. To show our appreciation, we are hosting a giveaway for a $100 Amazon gift card. To enter, leave us a five-star review on Apple Podcasts, and you will be entered in our drawing to win $100 Amazon gift card. We’re going to be choosing the winner at random on January 31st. Thank you for being such loyal listeners!

Let’s get into this whole new year’s resolution, “I’m going to get my life together in 2020; new decade, new me, new year.” Many of you are in a position where you want to make more money, start a business, quit your job. Maybe your goals are based around health, and you want to go back to the gym. I hear many of the common goals every new year – travel, business, health, and finance.

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Three Reasons Why I’m NOT a Fan of New Year’s Resolutions

I used to be a big fan of New Year’s resolutions because I was so good at them. I would make my resolution and go for my goal. I tend to execute what I want to do. I have a whole podcast episode on how to build self-confidence and why building self-confidence is a significant part of achieving your goals. As I’ve gotten older, as I’ve evolved and coached more people, I’ve seen many people make their New Year’s goals only to let them go by the end of the month.

As a result of my experience, I have changed my perspective on New Year’s resolutions. I understand the idea behind New Year’s goals; however, I’m no longer a fan. I no longer wait until a new year to go after what I want. A few months ago, I realized that I need to get back to the gym and get into shape; I didn’t need to wait until January to accomplish my goal. I got my ass back in the gym four months ago, and I’m loving the process and glad I jumped right in! I can see the results as I’m starting to get tone. Last month some of my trainers and instructors laughing because usually December is when people stop and I kept going. If you’re already working toward your goal before January, you’re not going to have to rebuild momentum in January because you never stopped.

Reason #1: If You Want Something, Go For It NOW

If you want to achieve a goal or do something goes, do it now! My team and I planned out our business plan for 2020 last quarter. We started planning early in the summer with my right-hand woman, Zanya, and our other team members. We figured out our business goals for 2020. Many members of the fire tribe I spoke with said 2020 is the year you wanted to get your business off the ground. I am more than happy to help you do that in my Persuade to Profit program.

I’m going to tell you now the same thing I said last year: if you wait until January and you want 2020 to be the year you get your business off the ground, you won’t see results until 2021.

Reason #2: People Have an Automatic Out

Part of the reason I’m not into New Year’s resolutions anymore is that I feel like people have an automatic out.

Let’s say you’re three weeks in going to the gym, and you realize that many of the people you started going to the gym on January 1st have already stopped going. Then you stopped going reasoning to yourself, “Well, everybody else stopped going. That means I can stop going too.” You have an automatic out because, by week three, there’s no expectation you need to fulfill your New Year’s resolution. This gives you an easy way out, and you start to rationalize why you haven’t been able to reach your goals.

New Year’s resolutions perpetuate the idea that there’s a perfect time to go after what we want. We have to wait for a “specific circumstance to happen” to go after what we want. Reality says this isn’t really – the perfect circumstance doesn’t exist. The “perfect time” is an excuse that people use to keep procrastinating and avoid making decisions and commitments. Do what it is you say you’re going to do, and show up.

I also understand why New Year’s resolutions are a big deal. I know that New Year’s marks a particular period in time, and I know people are self-reflective and making their plans for 2020 and the following decade.

Reason #3: New Year’s Resolutions Are an Easy Way to Self-Sabotage

I want to leave you with a tip on how not to self-sabotage during this New Year. My most successful clients commit to something they want. They’re hyper-focused on their goal, and they burn all the boats without a plan B. These people also tend to be pretty impatient by nature, committing their time, money, their self-mastery. Come hell or high water; they are accomplishing their goal. Many people aren’t accustomed to this type of commitment. They’re not accustomed to holding themselves accountable in that way because this kind of commitment requires change, and change is scary.

When things get scary or hard, they will quit by week three of January, when your muscles are sore or when you realize you haven’t made a million dollars in two weeks. When this realization occurs, people tend to quit. I have been in this game long enough, and I have seen many people quit along the way. Often, people ask me how I was able to make it as far as I have, especially given my origin story of having graduated during the recession and having a history of under-earning and low self-confidence, and I didn’t quit. I’ve gotten knocked down several times, but I got right back up again. What I’ve noticed is that most people aren’t willing to do that.

Here’s the main goal I need you to focus on: don’t quit. Please make that your only goal for now. Most people still quit on those because they aren’t committed enough, and they’re too focused on the external validation instead of focusing on the real challenge, which is to stay in the game. Once you bust through the other side of the painful part, you’ll feel awesome.

Resources that are mentioned or add value to this episode:

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